Zambia Hunt

When Ministry Relationships Must End

Throughout my 30+ years in Africa, I have encountered situations that sadly required ‘Necessary Endings.’ In the early days of CABU, a situation arose with a team member who was creating chaos and dissension. His method was to attack and then work to create sympathy for his position among the rest of the team. On more than one occasion, I met with him in the spirit of Matthew 18 to confront him over his unbiblical approach. The situation deteriorated to the point that the brother refused to meet with me. It was then that I gave the ultimatum that he needed to see me by a certain date, or his contract with the university would be terminated. He refused to meet, and his employment ended.

In retrospect, I should have taken that action much sooner, but I hesitated because I felt we needed his gifts and contributions to the work. I worried about how I would fulfill his responsibilities if he left. This became a painful but valuable learning experience that has guided my leadership decisions many times in the years since. The unexpected blessing that followed his departure was renewed peace among the team and fresh momentum in our ministry. 

This experience taught me that discernment about people is one of the most critical skills in ministry leadership. When should we continue investing in someone, and when is it time to part ways? What indicators should guide these difficult decisions?

Biblical Discernment in Leadership

In his book Necessary Endings, Henry Cloud offers valuable wisdom on this topic. His chapter “The Wise, The Foolish, and The Evil” provides a framework for identifying when to continue investing in someone in your organization and when to end the partnership. 

One of the greatest blessings in ministry is the people you serve with, and yet one of the most difficult challenges we face can be those same people. How do we know if someone is worthy of our continued time, energy, and resources? When is a necessary ending required? Scripture, particularly the book of Proverbs, gives us remarkable clarity on these questions.

Understanding these three categories of people—the wise, the foolish, and the evil—begins with recognizing the traits of those most valuable to your ministry: the wise. These are the people worthy of your greatest investment.

THE WISE

The Wise: People Are Worth Your Investment

The wise person is the kind of person you can confidently invest in. The ministry that is filled with these humble, determined, servant-leaders is a ministry that will achieve for the glory of God. Proverbs frequently contrasts the wise person with the fool and the wicked/evil person.

The wise person in Proverbs is characterized by a Love of knowledge: “The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out.” (Proverbs 18:15). Receptivity to correction: “Whoever heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.” (Proverbs 10:17), and Humility: “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2)

Traits of the Wise

1. When you give feedback, they listen, take it in, and make changes. “Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning.” (Proverbs 9:9)
2. They own their own performance, problems and outcomes. “The wisdom of the prudent is to discern his way, but the folly of fools is deceiving.” (Proverbs 14:8)
3. They are willing to apologize when they are wrong. “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13)
4. They change – they do not allow problems to turn into patterns. “For the righteous falls seven times and rises again, but the wicked stumble in times of calamity.” (Proverbs 24:16)

Developing Wisdom in Your Team

When you discover the traits of the wise in a member of your team, intentionally point out and affirm their biblical response to feedback and correction. This positive reinforcement helps them recognize the wisdom of their response. Take time to teach your entire team what the Scriptures say about wisdom and how it applies to their ministry roles. This sets clear biblical expectations and provides a goal for every team member to aspire toward.

These proactive steps create a culture where wisdom is celebrated and cultivated. These biblical standards will also serve as helpful reference points when you need to confront unwise responses to feedback or correction. Remember that developing wisdom in your team requires both affirmation of good examples and gentle correction of counterproductive patterns.

While wise team members energize and advance your ministry’s mission, foolish individuals present a different challenge. Unlike the wise, who grow through feedback, the foolish require a fundamentally different approach.

THE FOOL

The Foolish: When Talk Isn’t Enough

The foolish are not people who lack talent, ability, or are in some way unintelligent; no, they lack biblical wisdom, and it shows. They Reject correction: “Fools despise wisdom and instruction.” (Proverbs 1:7). They are also Self-deceived: “The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice” (Proverbs 12:15), and Quick-tempered: “Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult” (Proverbs 12:16).

When you identify this person in your organization, you must stop talking and take action. There must be clear consequences for a lack of change in these behaviors, and ultimately, these people must exit the ministry if they do not heed correction.

Traits of the Foolish

1. When given feedback, they become defensive. “A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.” (Proverbs 18:2)
2. When a problem is pointed out, they place the blame on some external factor. “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion outside! I shall be killed in the streets!’” (Proverbs 22:13)
3. They always make excuses; the problem is never with them. “Like a dog that returns to his vomit is a fool who repeats his folly.” (Proverbs 26:11)
4. They have little awareness or concern about the pain that their actions are causing others. “The righteous care about justice for the poor, but the wicked have no such concern.” (Proverbs 29:7)

Effective Strategies for Dealing with Foolishness

The strategy for dealing with fools is to teach through limits and consequences. Stop talking with them, that works for the wise team member, but not for the fool. Give them consequences that help them feel the pain of their choice not to listen, and limit their ability to continue in this destructive behavior.

As challenging as foolish team members can be, they at least lack malicious intent. The same cannot be said for the third category: the evil. These people are rare, but their presence in ministry is devastating and requires the most decisive action.

THE EVIL

The Evil: When Swift Action Is Required

By God’s grace, may you never have this person on your ministry team. Sadly, sometimes a ‘Judas’ sneaks in under the guise of being a disciple. These individuals are often extremely talented, personable, and admired by many, making them particularly dangerous to your ministry.

What distinguishes the evil person from the merely foolish is their hardened, malicious intent to cause deliberate harm. While the foolish person resists correction out of pride or insecurity, the evil person calculatingly seeks to damage others and undermine the ministry itself. They operate with a hidden agenda that becomes evident through patterns of divisiveness, manipulation, and sabotage.

When such people leave your ministry, they often delight in creating maximum chaos and pain, and would celebrate your downfall. They position themselves as enemies of the work God is doing. This goes far beyond differences of opinion, ministry philosophy, or personality conflicts—though these may be the platforms that eventually expose their evil intent.

When you identify these characteristics, the biblical response is not patient correction as with the foolish, but rather swift and decisive removal from your team. As Paul wrote to Titus, ‘As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him’ (Titus 3:10).

Identifying Truly Destructive Team Members

1. They simply want to cause maximum pain and damage. “A worthless person, a wicked man, goes about with crooked speech, winks with his eyes, signals with his feet, points with his finger, with perverted heart devises evil, continually sowing discord.” (Proverbs 6:12-14)
2. They are self-centered, not mission-centered. “There are those who are clean in their own eyes but are not washed of their filth.” (Proverbs 30:12)
3. People who delight in bringing others down. “Deceit is in the heart of those who devise evil, but those who plan peace have joy.” (Proverbs 12:20)
4. They seek to destroy. “The words of the wicked lie in wait for blood, but the mouth of the upright delivers them.” (Proverbs 12:6)

Protecting Your Ministry from Harm

If you are leading a ministry, you must be aware of these three types of people within your organization and how to deal with each one. We desire to develop the foolish into the wise through intentional, confrontational discipleship. Leaders must recognize each of these characteristics and make the adjustments necessary for the ministry to achieve its mission.

Conclusion: Stewarding God’s Ministry with Wisdom

As ministry leaders, we are called to be faithful stewards of the resources God has entrusted to us. Among these resources, our people are both the most valuable and the most challenging to steward well. The biblical categories of the wise, the foolish, and the evil give us a framework for discernment.

Investing in the wise should be our priority, as they multiply our efforts and advance the Kingdom. With the foolish, we must balance patience with accountability, always working for growth while being realistic about necessary consequences. And with the evil- those rare but devastating people- we must act decisively to protect the team from those who would cause harm.

Each necessary ending, though painful, creates space for new beginnings. Reflecting on my decades in ministry, I see how God used even the most difficult separations to redirect our path and renew our effectiveness. Remember that Jesus experienced a Judas in his inner circle, yet the betrayal didn’t derail the mission – it ultimately fulfilled it according to God’s perfect plan.

As you face these difficult decisions in your ministry context, remember, God promises wisdom to those who ask for it (James 1:5). Trust His guidance as you invest wisely in people, establish appropriate boundaries, and when needed, implement necessary endings with both courage and grace.

The health and effectiveness of your ministry depend on your discernment in these areas, and the advance of the gospel across Africa awaits leaders who make these hard choices well.